Congrats—You're Having a Teen!

August 15, 2022
Pediatrician Ginsburg challenges the notion that parenting an adolescent is something to survive rather than savor in this can-do guide to building a relationship with one’s teen. His “pro-development” approach focuses on recognizing a child’s inherent goodness and teaching them to identify their own personal strengths. Ginsburg urges parents to respect the developmental changes of adolescence by adopting a co-regulating “cold communication” style that calms feelings without squashing them (and that avoids anger or condescension); listening in a way that encourages teens to share; recognizing a kid’s ability to learn rather than dismissing them as irrational and impulsive; and guiding them gently by being a reliable “lighthouse parent.” Ginsburg provides an evidence-based understanding of adolescent development, suggests a general parenting frameworks rather than strict dos and don’ts, and establishes a model in which parents make decisions based on what they feel their teen will need to thrive at age 35. There’s a lot of information, but straightforward takeaways and accessible writing keep things in reach. This goes a long way in draining the dread from adolescence.

November 1, 2022

The American Academy of Pediatrics, long trusted as a solid voice for advice on parenting, attempts to present a balanced perspective centered around celebrating adolescence, yet recognizing challenges. This volume is dedicated to busting myths and sharing that teens do care about their parents' opinions. Their brains are rapidly changing, allowing them to be super learners, and though they are driven to explore limits, they can be both rational and thoughtful. The book addresses the challenges of LGBTQIA+ and racial identity during the teen years. The first step includes engaging in the emotional work to become a lighthouse parent, a stable force on the shore. Silent scripts inside a parent's head influence the way teens see themselves. Therefore, it is necessary to practice self-compassion first and then direct attention to the youths in their lives by recognizing the inherent good. Some of the topics Ginsburg explores are gender stereotypes, navigating the internet, building resilience in uncertain times, and responding to bullying and structural bias. VERDICT This comprehensive handbook will be indispensable to parents of preteens and teens.

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